49. Exodus


The rose is still on my windshield. It keeps me honest…and motivated.

Criticism’s unrelenting head presented itself because of my last post. Still, the new Fina, the one critics questioned (i.e. Would she worry about these things?), doesn’t care. Question away. My heart is in the right place.

In creating a ‘wish-list’ or ‘bucket-list’ or ‘check-list’ or ‘I wont fuck you if you don’t meet my standards-list’, some readers (friends) thought I was reverting back to the scared young adult, unsure of her confidence. That’s farce. It’s the opposite. Designed to keep me focused on ME and ignore distractions, my intentions weren’t seen clearly. I hope this provides clarity.

****

I’m wearing heels even though my feet are still blistered. I’m walking, no matter how painful it is. It takes more strength to acknowledge the heartbreak than it does to pretend to be unfazed by the decision to take this journey.

Somewhere between walking away and learning to live for me again, I have to mourn my losses. So I am. If you think that’s weakness, walk in my shoes.

It takes strength to say that you’re unhappy. It takes courage to admit fear. It takes coming to this realization to move forward.

I’m buying stock in Band-Aid.

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8 thoughts on “49. Exodus

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention 49. Exodus « Future4Fina -- Topsy.com
  2. “I’m wearing heels even though my feet are still blistered. I’m walking, no matter how painful it is. It takes more strength to acknowledge the heartbreak than it does to pretend to be unfazed by the decision to take this journey.”

    Wow–Such an amazing thought! I’m writing this in my journal. Thank you, I needed this encouragement 🙂

  3. it’s funny cause when i read that post i was talking to a friend on the phone and i mentioned to them how great i thought it was…i said that making a list of your wants & needs is absolutely a step in the right direction. i’ve often thought about making “an application to date me.” if for no other reason than to provide it to those that could find such a thing useful.

    if i were going to say anything about that post it would have been along the lines of T2H’s comment…make the list bigger, even more specific & broad.

    i also subscribe to the reasoning that it can’t be written in stone. because the list will change as you do.

    🙂
    xo

  4. 🙂 Sending some “spot” band-aids and gel sole inserts – I can see you stompin’ it out clear from here.

    AND flashin’ some dimple.

    Proud of you.

  5. I love that list. I love that you made that list. It’s part of loving yourself. That way, when being single gets lonely, you’ll remember that you don’t want to settle for Mr. Right Now when Mr. Right is still out there.

    Now walk proud, girl. Your battle scars make you beautiful.

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